I can't think of a better way to spend one's time -- except maybe switching that damn box over to OS X server.
apt-get is just as bad as RPM hell was it seems.
And this is a variant of the same shit I was going through since 1998: get your Linux box running nice and comfortably, but don't update a damn thing or you'll regret it you poor bastard!
X is a legacy POS that needs replaced with something else that has the same functionality. Sorry, I don't want to spend 3 hours hacking at my xorg.conf anymore than I want to go back to toying with autoexec.bat files to play some new game I bought. Move on.