All Things Microsoft > Microsoft Hardware

How MrX killed his poor 3 button microsoft mouse.

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MrX:
In the topic i made called 'microshat mouse' i mentioned that i had gotten a replacement for my old mouse. well, i sure demolished it alright. its one of those stupid white, two button and a scroll generic mouse they sell new for $30 when its only worth $3. When windoze 98 kept on screwing up i smashed the mouse on the desk viciously until the mouse pointer struggled to move across the screen.
then i yanked it out and replaced it with the optical mouse. i gave myself a week 'cool down' time. then i commenced to pay back [microsoft] all the troubles it caused me. the mouse tail is about 4 freakin meters long (which gives you extra swing speed) . first i swung it around, in the air as high as it could go about 3 times. it hit the pavement hard. but hardly any damage. so i swung it and got it stuck in a big tree. about 3 days later (when it fell down) i thougt the torture wasnt over. with the scroll wheel jammed in and a right clicker crooked i started brainstorming. big hammer? huge ancor? baseball bat? huge ancor!

this is what you do. get some duck tape and totally cover it around the mouse with 4 layers. (this is so fragments wont get stuck in your legs and eyes, and at the end is less clean up) place the mouse on a cold, hard garage floor. then lift up the 60 pound ancor and let it go on the drop zone. boom! smash crack. do this about ten times, or until your fustration gets transfered from your body to the damn ground.

then unravel the duck tape(you may want to use a knife to cut it open) over a garbage can. evaluate the powdered remains. find the microsoft mouse ppga chip and spit on it.
then you're done! yay. now im not as fustrated. smashing always works.

Fett101:
I woulda gone with explosives.

Why did this require a new thread?

Orethrius:
A little thermite is a wonderful thing.  I also hear Drain-O is quite explosive.  The reason why this required its own thread is because he didn't want to mention that the mouse had met its demise in the same thread where he posted for help with it.  Wait, that's not a very good reason at all...    

mobrien_12:
" find the microsoft mouse ppga chip and spit on it."

Why stop there... why not just urinate on the thing  

Orethrius:

quote:Originally posted by M. O'Brien:
" find the microsoft mouse ppga chip and spit on it."

Why stop there... why not just urinate on the thing        
--- End quote ---


I'd say set it ablaze, but I'm scared that might reactivate the original spell used by Microsoft to animate the dead.

Edit: ...and we all know how prolific Microsoft is when it comes to reviving things that should, by all defined logic, be long dead and gone by now.

[ June 25, 2004: Message edited by: Midnight Candidate ]

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